Drug Store Protocol

It happened again. Convenience /Drug store customers never cease to amaze me. I can only imagine what it must feel like for the employees. Be it a CVS, Rite Aid, or Walgreen’s, it's all the same. I don't think it helped that I had been slow roasting in the afternoon heat and so therefore, displayed Bush-like patience. Here is my case, brought before the masses, for a simple, standard in Drug Store Protocol, known as DSP:

Violation resultant in disbarment from aforementioned establishments within a 10 mile radius from my apartment.

Section 1.1

Mass grocery shopping to be left to the supermarkets. Applicable, but not limited to, Safeway, Harris Teeter, Giant, Albertson's, and Trader Joe's. Notice, you have plenty of other options -- they also have amazing engineering and logistical devices known as "express lanes" and "self-checkout", drug stores do not. There is a reason for that. Compliance is appreciated.

Section 1.2

Not paying attention while talking on cellular devices, that lead to stupid questions and the trying on of cheap pink or blue sandals, is frowned on as an act of the highest level of stupidity. Notice any changing rooms at a CVS? That's because you shouldn't be buying articles of clothing there in the first place. Do this at the mall or your other retail options. Again applicable, but not limited to, Nordstrom’s, Macy's, Meier & Frank, Mervyns. You can try on as many exciting outfits there as you like.

Section 1.3

Be it understood that Drug/Convenience Stores are intended for the sole purpose of buying crap in small quantities. There are no shopping carts, only hand carts. Guess why? They don't want you to buy a lot of stuff. Neither do I, and every poor soul standing behind you. There is not a produce, meat or delicatessen. Therefore, there is nothing to smell and make sure it "feels right". Everything is in some package form. The clerk doesn't even ask you if you want paper or plastic. That's because if you are normal, you don't need a bag. You take your gum, magazine, or bottle of water and leave the premise. The following items take priority:

a) Prescription refills
b) Gum
c) Water
d) Magazines

...Armenia

As luck would have it, Alexandria hosted their annual Armenian Festival the weekend I got the news; and it's a good thing cause I know basically nothing about this entire area. I realize I could go somewhere else (like Georgia or Azerbaijan) but I thought I would make a conscience effort to learn as much as I can about all three.

First off, this country is learning to cope with the workings of a free market economy. When I told one lady what I would be doing, she sounded optimistic about the IT industry there. Okay, so far so good. I asked the same lady what the weather is like there, she mentioned that winters extended into May! This is sounding better as the conversation keeps going -- I'm more a fan of winter than summer. Then, I walked over to some Armenian volunteer society booth and discussed what is going on with Armenia and it's neighbors, most notably, Iran. This lady told me Armenia happens to be just 30 minutes by plane to Tehran and that, contrary to our western media and the neo-con community, actually quite safe. While I don't think I'll be breaking bread with the Ayatollah, passport privileges permitting, I could see my curiosity getting the best of me.

Caucasus Region

It took me a while to figure out exactly where it was the recruiter told me I would be off to. Then, he told me I had been nominated for a computer science project in either Georgia, Armenia, or Azerbaijan early in '08. I know just about nothing regarding this area...which makes it all the more interesting.

More details later...

Banker tapped for Bank

It seems every time our el Presidente taps someone for a certain position, his party cringes and the rest of us puke. The World Bank was filled with someone who led the design of arguably the most controversial war in US history, a female fossil for a Supreme Court Justice spot, and a short fuzed-milk man to play nice with the rest of the world. All that being said, the most recent tap seems, in hindsight, a pretty decent one.

It helps that it is someone with banking experience, coupled with a diplomatic (rather than militaristic) background. He just looks like a banker. I can easily see him staring at me over the counter and saying, "Sir, you'll need to fill out a deposit slip for that." Only this time it's going to be, "Cambodia, we'll reduce the interest rate on you 30 year loan by 25% if you stop selling your under 14 population as sex slaves."

Srta. Universe Recap

I was hedging my bets on Venezuela. Brazil did have a great showing though. India lacked compared to their previous winners. Both East Asian reps (Japan and Korea) were good, but not enough for me to pick one of them to go all the way. Like many times before, my voice was not heard.

But of course, all the rage the morning after is our own going down in a blaze of glory during the evening gown section. At that point, she was so far out of reach, she should have double-downed and stripped! I could see a jump from 5th to 3rd, maybe even 2nd. Our prudish image would be eliminated.

Personally, I thought the show was better on Telemundo -- It was in Mexico City, adding authenticity to the overall feel, the lady MC on that station showed a little more, and the fact I couldn't understand the dude next to her talking, made it all the better. Nelly Furtado was a good selection for the intro music. And, I thought it was cool that a bald one made it into the top ten, once again showing it is all about whats on the inside of these women that counts most.

Memorial Day Weekend

It's a weekend we're supposed to celebrate our fallen from war, both past and, unfortunately, present. However you choose to do this, just make sure that you do.

On a somewhat lighter note, we were having a discussion a while back, at lunch, about airport security. It seems every time we go thru the lines, some new technology is in place. Its been a few months since I've flown last, but a machine I was asked to step thru slightly resembled that of what would have been seen on Battle Star Galactica. Finally, I have my answer as to what a "puffer" is. According to that same article, new and exciting airport security features ("sniffer") will be coming to a terminal near you. Who comes up with these names? Sniffer? Puffer?

As promised ...

to my coworkers, before I left FSI, I would make 7-layer dip, so here it is, from the bottom up:

Layer 1: Refried beans (two cans)
Layer 2: Three avocados + two 1/4 cup of lime juice = really good guacamole
Layer 3: Hot salsa (one jar)
Layer 4: Diced lettuce (1/3 of a head)
Layer 5: Medium salsa (1/2 jar) + diced jalapenos
Layer 6: Sour cream (one jar)
Layer 7: Cheese (1/2 a block grated or two bags of shredded)

That burning sensation in your stomach is my way of saying thank you for the last year and a half. Enjoy!